


Swan Song's Heist

by Gastrodon, somefangirl



Category: One Piece
Genre: Fake Dating, M/M, Masquerade, ZoLu Week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-07-14
Packaged: 2018-12-02 00:13:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11497749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gastrodon/pseuds/Gastrodon, https://archiveofourown.org/users/somefangirl/pseuds/somefangirl
Summary: The masquerade is the site of both robbery and a murder mystery, but Zoro finds the real crime is Nami meddling in his love life.





	Swan Song's Heist

**Author's Note:**

> IMPORTANT: this fic wasn't my work alone! it was written in equal parts by me and my friend, Maddie. their tumblr is baratiepromise, go check it out to see some really cool art and also a generally wonderful person. i have more notes at the bottom, but they can wait. until then, we hope you enjoy!

"Listen up, everyone. I want to go over the plan one more time. Everyone at this party is rich, so there's a lot to gain. I don't want to mess this up," Nami says. She looks in the rear view mirror at her friends in the back of the car to make sure they're paying attention. A sharp glare towards Usopp and Luffy, who are busy shoving at each other's faces, makes them both freeze up and direct their gazes toward her. Satisfied, she looks back at the road in front, "I'll be doing all the robbing. I've been posing as a maid here over the past week, so no one will suspect me moving around. Even so, these are nobles, they’ve always been paranoid, so all of you need to be my distraction so no one notices what I'm doing. I want this to work, okay?" Nami glances in the rear view mirror again, then taps the fox-themed mask on her face, "Remember not to remove your masks once we enter. This is a masquerade, and the police have been plastering our faces on every news channel for weeks. Stick to your characters, too, and try not to call each other by name. You all remember your characters?"

"Nami, I wanna wear the hero mask," Luffy complains loudly, ignoring her, "why does Usopp get it? Let me!"

"Your mask is fine, Luffy. I picked it out, special." Nami says, "Usopp's mask has a big hole in it for his nose, anyway. You don't want it."

"And a dragon is cool!" Usopp grabs Luffy's draconic mask by the corners, then snaps it against his face. The little red scales decorating the mask shine in the light of streetlamps that pass by their cars as he does, the design of it poking into his cheeks a bit. Its angular shape to match the shape of a dragon’s face doesn’t necessarily feel nice against his skin, especially not when snapped back on. Luffy shoves at Usopp’s hands, ready to start something in defiance.

"Okay, roles," Nami repeats loudly, stopping that before it started. Snapping her fingers, She continues, "This is a huge job for us! I don't want to fuck it up and I've already got Vivi covering for us back at home. So, I'm a maid, and Robin is..."

"A detective," Robin finishes smoothly, sitting in the back of the large van. It's the only thing that can somewhat fit their group, "A private one; to be specific. That's just if anyone asks."

"I'm a construction worker," Franky says, though it's unlikely anyone will ask him, as he won't be in the ballroom. In the seat next to him, Chopper speaks up.

"I'm a doctor! Or at least, learning to be one," Chopper says, “Which...isn’t that far off from the truth.”

"I'm a... what am I again?" Usopp blinks, confused, "besides a totally badass hero?"

"I'm a cook," Sanji interjects, "But that's not any different. Tonight I shall woo all the ladies of the party as a distraction for my lovely Nami!"

He grins, squished in the seat with Usopp and Luffy. Zoro in the front passenger seat spares Nami a glance, to which she just shrugs.

"Brook's working as a musician, so he's already at the party," Nami explains. The mansion, large and impressive even in the dark, comes into view. Nami pulls up a long driveway, and after she parks she turns to face Zoro and Luffy, "Luffy and Zoro, you two need to be ready to cover our retreat in case things go south so we can get out alright. Don't break character."

"What's our character again?" Luffy says, messing with his mask. He and Nami are the only ones already wearing theirs, as most everyone else had left theirs off in their laps for the ride over.

"Newlyweds," Zoro answers, staring at the fake ring on his finger, "Me and you are newlyweds, Luffy."

"Oh, right," Luffy says, looking at his own ring. The diamonds are plastic, Nami didn't want to spend much on their disguises. Hopefully no one will look to hard at them.

"Zoro, Luffy, don't leave each other's sides. You need to stick together in case something happens," Nami says, "Zoro, you also need to make sure Luffy doesn't cause any trouble that would jeopardize the plan. And be convincing! You're supposed to be soulmates, act like you love each other!"

Zoro frowns. Goddamn Nami, setting them to this role as to 'push things along.' How could this push anything along? Sure, he's got something bad for Luffy, but he doesn't need help and he doesn't need it like this!

"I'm gonna stick to the food bar," Luffy grins, unaware of Zoro's thoughts, "That'll be easy, right?"

"We're just there to mill around while Nami steals shit," Zoro shrugs, twisting the ring absently. How the hell is he supposed to make this convincing?

"Yeah, so don't mess it up. If Luffy sticks to the food bar, you'd better stick to him. Just enjoy the party, you two," Nami says, "The rest of you know the distraction plan already, so if there aren't any more questions, we can head inside. If this works out, we're going to be rich!"

They pile out of the car, filtering inside. Zoro puts on his mask, waiting for Luffy to come to him. Since he has to be married to Luffy for the night, he may as well walk in with Luffy.

Everyone at the party is dressed to the nines, and the crew is no exception. The party is a fantasy-themed masquerade, hosted by and for elites. The wealthy and the noble fill the ballroom, as do their security guards. This makes it an operation of high risk and, if successful, high reward.

"So me and Zoro are married," Luffy says as they approach the front door, "That's kinda weird!"

"I don't know where she comes up with this stuff," Zoro says as he holds out his arm for Luffy to take, "If we're going to be married, you should hold onto me. Couples hold hands and shit, right?"

"Sure!" Luffy grabs onto Zoro's arm, "I dunno, I've never been in a relationship!"

"Of course you have, we're married. You must've dated me at some point," Zoro says, grinning. He leads Luffy into the mansion by the arm.

The ballroom is lit up brightly, decorated heavily. People in fantastical masks mill around, barely paying any attention to those entering. Luffy smiles at the party aspect of it all, but the whole... stuck-up rich person, not-really-a-banquet vibe doesn't really get with him.

Zoro watches Luffy, letting his smiling faux-husband lead him to the food table. Luffy immediately releases Zoro's arm, instead grabbing a plate to start piling it high with food. Zoro continues to watch Luffy as he grabs food upon food to eat. Zoro turns away briefly, awkward. Is this where they starts acting like they're married?

"Slow down, uh... honey. Don't want to grab more than you can eat," Zoro says.

"...Honey?" Luffy snickers, barely holding back full blown laughter.

"We're in love. I'm acting like it," Zoro mutters, grabbing his own plate, "You know, pet names."

"Okay Zoro, Whatever you say," Luffy continues to huff a bit of laughter under his breath as he grabs more food.

"If you dislike the pet names, I'll drop them," Zoro says.

"Hmm..." Luffy hums, shoving an appetizer into his mouth, "Nah, we're married. So it's ok," He grins.

"Alright, but if you're going to laugh every time, I’m stopping," Zoro says. It isn't much of a threat, though, as Luffy seems indifferent to them and they just embarrass Zoro.

"I won't!" Luffy takes his plate and stands against the wall, Zoro following, "How long is Nami gonna take?"

"I don't know. Probably a while," Zoro says, "We'll probably be here a few hours, so just relax."

"Boring," Luffy pokes at his food, looking at Zoro now. "Zoro's got a cool mask, but I'm cooler. I'm a dragon."

"What, demons aren't cool?" Zoro asks, "Demons are way cooler. If a demon and a dragon fought, I bet the demon would win."

"Nah, dragons are cooler and much stronger, so there’s no way they’d lose," Luffy taps on his mask, feeling the fake scales, "I'm a dragon."

"You sure are," Zoro says, reaching up a bit to rest an arm on top of Luffy’s head, "Smallest dragon I've ever seen. Aren’t they supposed to tower over their enemies?”

"Dragons bite," Luffy warns, "Zoro's demon mask is pretty nice, though. He's got horns."

Zoro grins, turning his head to show off. The horns are long and black, and though they're heavy, they're impressive enough that it's worth it.

"Pretty damn cool, right?" Zoro asks. Luffy reaches up, tugging on the horn.

"Nami said I couldn't have anything like these, I'd break 'em," Luffy says.

"You do break a lot of stuff," Zoro says.

"It's fine." Luffy dumps the food into his mouth, going back for more. Zoro watches Luffy go from the wall, awaiting his return. He’s not sure if Luffy feels this, but conversation with him feels so much more awkward now that they’re pretending to be a couple. Conversations used to move so smoothly with Luffy, but now everything he’s saying feels… forced. Zoro picks at his suit jacket, wondering if pretending to date will hurt their relationship more than it helps.

The lapse of silence that follows as Luffy eats and Zoro struggles to find a topic to talk about is interrupted by a very triumphant tone cutting into all other conversations, stopping nobles dancing and people mingling alike.

"I'm a world-renowned sharpshooter! So famous, they call me the King of Snipers!" Usopp says to the pink-haired man listening to him, loud enough to draw the attention of a few other attendants than just the one he's speaking to, "I could shoot a mouse's eye a hundred yards away! I could do it with my eyes closed, even! You'll never meet a sniper half as skilled as me!"

Usopp makes grand gestures as he speaks, keeping the attention of the small crowd he'd gathered with his words, spinning fantastical stories to impress his listeners. Whether or not they believe him, though, is a different matter entirely.

"Really?! A mouse's eye?!" Chopper exclaims, easily amused and happy to listen to Usopp's tales.

"Of course!" Usopp slams a fist on his chest with confidence, "Hell, I could kill it with a knife, fired straight from my slingshot!"

"That's amazing!" Chopper cries, believing every word. Usopp seems to soak up the attention he gets for his story, though it's hard to tell given that his mask covers his whole face. He continues entertaining those who are close enough to hear in stories of his past feats, all heavily exaggerated.

Luffy stands next to Zoro, eating absently as they watch the crowds mingle and move. His attention is drawn back to the present as Zoro notices a girl eying him from across the room. She wears a heavily decorated mask and a very large blue dress which shimmers in the light. Soon she’s striding forth, coming across the way to talk.

"Hello," She curtsies upon walking up to him, smiling. "Are you enjoying the party?"

It's clear she's only talking to Zoro.

"I'm having fun," Zoro says, nodding. She's probably around his age, and by her jewelry, definitely rich. With her obvious money and elaborate dress, she may as well be royalty. Zoro stares at her a moment, recognizing her to be Shalulia. She's the daughter of Roswald, an incredibly rich nobleman and the host of the party.

"It's quite the night, isn't it?” Shalulia says, looking around, "Your mask is very... intricate."

Luffy pauses from his motions of shoving food into his face next to Zoro, staring at Shalulia.

"One hell of a mask for one hell of a party," Zoro says, "But yours is just as intricate as mine."

"Mine, too," Luffy butts in, getting closer to Zoro. He gets a bad feeling from this girl. Shalulia barely regards Luffy, a passing glance before focusing on Zoro again.

"Can you guess what I am?" She asks, spinning around, "I had this custom made, you see. The mask, too!"

"You're a princess, right?" Zoro asks. He's pretty sure she's flirting with him, and he's not all that interested. He looks to Luffy, quickly taking Luffy's hand as he looks at Luffy's face, "What do you think, love?"

The pet names still feel alien in Zoro's mouth, but he wants to get his point across.

"I think she looks dumb," Luffy mutters, stepping closer to Zoro.

"I... sorry, what?" She looks at their linked hands. "Love?"

"Love," Zoro says. He brings their linked hands up, "This is my... husband."

"I'm the husband," Luffy says quickly, staring at her.

"Oh... you're..." Shalulia seems to flounder, pulling at her dress a bit, "You're married?"

"Yes, happily married," Zoro says, still watching Luffy. He lets go of Luffy's hand and hesitantly pulls Luffy close to himself, "Very happy, very married. Right, dear?"

The stiffness and awkwardness that Zoro had felt before is back again, but this time amplified everytime he drops a pet name.

"M...married. Yeah," Luffy nods, lips pursing in that way they do when he's lying.

"Oh." Shalulia looks disappointed, "That's, uh... how long?"

"Not long. We're on our honeymoon. Right, honey?" Zoro says.

"Yeah," Luffy responds, squeezing Zoro's hand. Zoro looks a bit surprised, looking at their hands.

"Uh... you’re sure?" Shalulia asks, a little suspicious, catching onto the way Zoro’s looked at their hands then to his ‘husband’s’ face, as if he wasn’t expecting that.

"We're... still getting used to it. The wedding was so... amazing, it's hard to believe it was real," Zoro explains, poorly. Stirring up this story was harder than once thought...

"Was really big," Luffy says quickly, "Uh, we...had...a lot of food there! And--and...a big party!"

She doesn't seem convinced.

"May I see your ring?" She asks, looking at Zoro.

"Sure," Zoro nods, holding his hand out. Zoro has a wedding band, while Luffy got the engagement ring and wedding band combo.

"This seems fake," she says, "Is it... plastic?"

"Uh, well... we kinda had to go cheap," Zoro says, "blew a shit ton on setup."

"Right..." Shalulia says, "How long have you two been together?"

"Two years," Zoro says. It's how long he's known Luffy for. He looks down at his pretend partner and tells Shalulia the first true thing he's said all night, "I've loved him since the day we met."

"Two years?" She questions, "And you just got married? Pretty fast, if you ask me."

"Neither of us asked you." Luffy turns his head toward her, the blank stare he gives her almost threatening. She falters, moving back a bit out of instinct.

"I didn't-- I've just never heard of anyone marrying after only two years," she says.

"I love him a lot, so we got married," Luffy says.

"I..." Shalulia plays with her hair more, floundering, "You're very lucky, then."

Luffy looks up at Zoro.

"With him by my side, I'm the luckiest on earth," Luffy says. Zoro's surprised by the sincerity. When did Luffy learn to lie? He sounds like he means it, and Zoro would like to think he does... Zoro gets the gut wrenching urge to push the mask up off Luffy's face and kiss him, just to see how he'd react. His hair pushed back from the mask being moved, his lips slightly open from surprise... Zoro cuts off the thoughts. As if he'd be able to do that. He focuses back on the matter, Luffy can lie and get away with it.

"I'm the luckiest," Zoro says quietly, "...Anyway, yeah. This is my husband."

"Right. Your husband," Shalulia says. She looks Luffy up and down, then looks back to Zoro, "Guess you would say no if I asked you to dance?"

"I'd say no," Zoro agrees, "A honeymoon is celebrated with the one you married, after all."

"Right. Of course," She says, "Well, this was... fun, but I think we're done here."

Shalulia walks off, deciding to find someone else to talk to.

Sanji peruses the party calmly, searching the ground. He's got a huge grin on his face, waiting to see a beautiful lady to talk to. He sees a girl walking away from Zoro and Luffy, in a huff.

"Mademoiselle!" Sanji calls, practically twirling toward her, "I was frozen by your beauty, o beautiful princess. May we dance?"

"Dance?" Shalulia asks. She looks Sanji over. He's not the same kind of handsome as that last man, but he hasn't got a ring and his princely mask is certainly more appealing... She offers her hand, "Lead the way."

"Wonderful!" Sanji cries, whisking her off to the dance floor, "a beautiful lady such as yourself shouldn't be alone on a night like this. You may call me... Prince."

He would say his real name, but that's the thing with being a wanted criminal, you really shouldn't give that out.

"Prince? Then you may call me Princess," she says. They dance for a little before she speaks again, "You can dance well. Is there any other skills you might want to show me?"

"Ah, I would love to, but I can't here," Sanji smiles, twirling her, "I'm a skilled chef, you see. One of the best, if I may."

"You are? What kind of dish are you best with, then?" she asks. She has to speak up a little, for as they dance they get closer to the band. Brook sits up at front, though he doesn't seem to notice Sanji dancing just in front of him.

"I'm best with seafoods, you see," Sanji explains, "My father trained me when I was young on the best ways to cook. How to cut things, where to do it... it's important to me that my hands are always ready to cook."

"That's very impressive," She says, "If only you could cook for me, I would love to watch those hands at work."

"I-I would love to cook for you!" Sanji looks shocked and excited, the fact that a woman actually is interested in his advances is new and exciting, "I shall impress you with my knife skills and fine cuisine!"

"I look forward to it," She says, grinning.

Zoro watches Shalulia dancing with Sanji a moment, then looks down to Luffy again. Zoro would like to dance with Luffy, and if they're married, they probably should, right? Just imagining holding Luffy close to dance... If Zoro's ever going to dance with Luffy, it'll have to be now.

"Speaking of dancing..." Zoro starts, "We've been standing by this wall for a while. Do you want to dance with me?"

"I can dance!" Luffy says, and it’s in such a burst it’s almost as if he was waiting impatiently the whole entire time for Zoro to ask, pulling Zoro to the floor without any hesitation, "Don't step on my feet, though."

"I'm not going to step on your feet," Zoro says, letting Luffy lead their dancing.

The song is fairly fast, but before Zoro can be thankful they don't have to slow dance, the song fades out. As if Zoro's thoughts summoned it, a far more romantic song begins to play. Zoro looks to the musicians nearby, where he sees Brook grinning at him from under his skeletal mask. Is everyone determined to try to help him and Luffy along?

"I'm going to kill you for this..." Zoro mutters, gaining a look from a few nearby dancers, Luffy included.

"Why's Zoro gonna kill him?" Luffy asks, "We're just dancing."

Luffy doesn't really hide the fact he wants to keep dancing.

"...Right," Zoro says. He continues letting Luffy lead him in silence for a few moments, but the close contact and romantic music have his mind wandering. Luffy was incredibly convincing before with Shalulia, and Zoro wants to know where the ability to do so came from. Zoro soon speaks up, "Hey, Luffy, when did you learn to lie? You even had me fooled for a moment back there with some of the stuff you said, like being the luckiest to have me..."

"I am the luckiest, so it wasn't a lie," Luffy says, squeezing Zoro's hand. "I'm really bad at lying, so I decide to be truthful."

"Oh," Zoro says. His voice is quiet, as the music is soft. Zoro can barely hear the song anymore, though, his focus is on Luffy only, "You know, I wasn't lying about everything, either. I was telling the truth when I said I was the luckiest, too, and... some other stuff."

"I can't tell when Zoro lies," Luffy replies quietly, stopping their swaying for a moment, "What else did Zoro say that was truthful?"

"What else?" Zoro asks. He said he's loved Luffy since they met and he meant it, but should he tell Luffy that?

"Zoro forgot?" Luffy takes his response as confusion, "Then... maybe I can try and show Zoro what I felt when we were talking. Maybe he’ll remember.”

Zoro doesn't know what Luffy means by that, but he nods.

"Show me what you felt," Zoro says.

* * *

 

In the dark of the mansion's basement, Franky opens the door to the fuse box. He uses a light attached to his robotic mask to see, something those upstairs in the ballroom are soon sure to wish they had. The power only needs to be off for a few moments, and hopefully Nami will be able to steal without interference.

* * *

 

Luffy tightens his hold on Zoro, then moves his hands up to Zoro’s cheeks, thumbs under the mask. He slowly pushes it back, onto Zoro’s head, and presses up against Zoro, his hands moving to Zoro’s shoulders. He glances at Zoro’s lips, leaning in, hoping Zoro will get the memo.

Zoro takes a second to realize what's happening, then leans down to reciprocate. Before he can get close enough, the lights suddenly cut. There's a few shouts of shock as those in attendance try to figure out what's happening, and Zoro pulls away from the near-kiss. Suddenly there's a scream, and the music sours with the sudden loss of a violin. It clatters loudly to the ground and Zoro grabs Luffy's waist, pulling him closer, Luffy tightens his hold on Zoro’s shoulder out of shock, twisting the fabric of his suit in his hands. The darkness stretches a moment longer, and when the lights flicker back on, Brook is on the floor. A woman screams, someone in the crowd faints, and the host, Roswald, looks horrified.

“Is he dead!?” He says, “The party is ruined! Get to the bottom of this, someone, right now!”

"Brook!" Luffy yells, shocked, wrenching away from Zoro.

There's blood on his chest, a stab wound in his heart. He was old, sure, so maybe this was bound to happen soon, but nobody wanted it like that!

"S-Stay back!" A pink haired man yells as Luffy rushes toward the body, "Don't touch the body!"

Luffy tries to rush forward anyway but is stopped by Zoro, who grabs him. The pink haired man--the same who Usopp had been talking to earlier--approaches Brook. He's cut off by Chopper, who runs forward.

"I'm a doctor!" Chopper says, "Let me try and help him!"

Chopper kneels down next to the body, checking him over. If it weren't for how serious the situation was, it would almost be laughable to see someone in a reindeer mask kneeling over a bloody body. However, no one finds any comedy in it as he sits up, solemn-faced.

"He's... he's dead." Chopper says, "His pulse is already gone, the wound hit his heart..."

"Let me go!" Luffy is practically wrestling Zoro, "What's wrong with you, Zoro?! Let me go! Who the hell did this?!"

"What're you going to do? You can't help him," Zoro says. He can't let Luffy near Brook and he knows it.

"Who would have done something like this?" Chopper asks.

"Yes, who?" Robin seems to emerge from shadows, smiling, "Clearly this wasn't done alone. The lights went off, and a body appears. Who among us?" She clasps her hands behind her back, and Luffy stares at her, shocked. She looks to the pink haired man, "Well, Mr. Policeman?"

"It's Coby," The pink haired man says, introducing himself, "The weapon was a knife... who could use one? It would have to be someone close..."

"Or someone able to throw one," Chopper offers.

"Let's look at the people nearby, then." Robin says, "Would anyone here have been able to do it?"

"There's the other musicians," Coby says, "They're all close to him."

"Their hands are all full with instruments," Robin says, "They'd have to make an extra hand appear out of thin air to kill him, which isn't something anyone can do."

"Then those on the dance floor," Coby says. "They're close enough to run forward and stab him."

"So up front, our suspects are a hero, a prince, and a princess," Robin says. She doesn't want to accuse Luffy or Zoro, since Zoro is supposed to keep Luffy from getting upset. Luffy could ruin everything, after all, "Would any of them--"

"Wait, there's that demon and dragon couple, too," Coby says, cutting Robin off, "They're just as close as the other three. We can't overlook them."

"Of course, my mistake," Robin says. Fine, then she needs to clear their names before Luffy gets worked up, "As I was saying, would any of them have been able to kill him?"

"The hero could have. He told me earlier, he could throw a knife in the dark accurately. He has the skill to be able to do it," Coby says.

"I didn't mean like this!" Usopp says.

"Could the prince or princess have done it?" Robin asks.

"The prince could have!" Shalulia says, "He broke away from me when it got dark, and he said he was good with a knife!"

"In the kitchen, my dear, not in a murder!" Sanji says, but Shalulia steps further away from him. Luffy finally breaks away from Zoro to run forward, trying to get to Brook again, but is caught around the waist by Robin.

"Let me go!" Luffy scratches at her arm as she pushes him back to Zoro.

"What about the couple?" Coby asks, "Charging at the body is suspicious, are you trying to hide evidence?"

"No! He was my friend!" Luffy says, upset he's even being accused.

"It isn't him. He's not good with knives, anyway," Robin says, "Or with lying."

"But it could be his partner," Shalulia says, "I overheard him when we passed! He threatened the musician when the song changed!"

"And he's good with a sword!" Chopper says, caught up in the excitement of the investigation. Luffy looks back at Zoro, shocked.

"I didn't do it! I was dancing with him the whole time!" Zoro said, pointing to Luffy. "He was holding me. I couldn't have killed anyone without him knowing."

"Zoro didn't." Luffy says slowly, irritated that nobody would let him go back to Brook. "But you two?!" He whirls on Usopp and Sanji, both looking surprised, "What the hell is this?! Who did it?!"

"Come on, Luffy. Let the detectives figure it out." Zoro says, pulling him back a few steps.

Unnoticed by those arguing, a maid in a fox mask makes her way through the crowd, a sheet draped over one arm. She bumps into a few people as she goes, making her way to the front of the ballroom to pass the sheet off to Chopper. He tosses the sheet over Brook, and the maid leaves. With their focuses on the murder, no one in the crowd notices if their pockets are suddenly lighter as she goes by.

"What the hell is your problem?" Luffy whispers harshly, "Brook is dead! Someone killed him--one of our friends! Let me go!"

"Trouble in paradise?" Shalulia sneers, "I still think he killed him!"

"I didn't. You know that," Zoro says, looking at Luffy, "Luffy, do you trust me?"

"Should I?" Luffy seems unsure, holding away from Zoro.

"Please," Zoro says, "Luffy, if you trust me, just sit this one out. Things will be alright, I swear."

"How can I sit this out?!" Luffy demands, shaking his head.

"Luffy, there's nothing you can do. Let those two handle this," Zoro says. He stops holding Luffy so tight and instead cups Luffy's face in his hands. He's become used to casual affection over the course of the night, so it's far more natural. He meets Luffy's eyes, "I'm asking you to trust me. Calm down and wait, things will work out."

Luffy visibly relaxes a fraction of an inch, looking at Brook. Luffy sucks in a breath and tightens his hold on Zoro's shirt, clearly upset. "I'm gonna kill whoever did it."

"I know," Zoro says, nodding. He wraps his arms around Luffy, hoping to ease Luffy's pain. Luffy seems to take comfort in it, turning his face away and into Zoro's chest.

"So the couple didn't do it," Robin says, watching them, "What about you, hero?"

"No, of course not!" Usopp says, "He was my friend! He was both of our friend! Why would we?"

"He's right," Sanji says, "We all know that musician. None of us would kill him!"

"But one of you did." Coby worries at the edge of his jacket, "I'm sorry, but it's true, and this shouldn't just be solved by us."

"What do you mean?" Robin asks, "Who else is supposed to help?"

"The police!" Coby cries, "We shouldn't just be standing here! We should call them right away!"

"That's not necessary," Robin says, "I'm a detective and you're a police officer, we should be able to solve this without help."

"You're not a detective I've ever seen before," Coby says, though her witchy mask does cover most of her face.

"I'm quite private," She explains, "That's why. Come now, let's just solve this." Robin tucks some hair behind her ear, "The couple has an alibi, correct?"

"Like I said," Zoro is keeping Luffy close, "we were holding onto each other the whole time. And with how upset he is? Why the hell would I do it? He was my friend too."

"He was friends with all of you, and still he's dead," Coby says, "That excuse doesn't mean anything, unfortunately."

"He was still holding me," Luffy turns his head, "So it wasn't me or Zoro."

"Zoro? That name's familiar..." Coby says.

"Probably that movie about the swordsman," Zoro says. He really doesn't need to be arrested because Luffy forgot not to say his name in front of a cop, "You have bigger mysteries to solve than where you've heard my name before."

"Right," Coby says slowly, turning to look at the body, "If I can't find something soon, I'm taking you all in for questions. I'm sorry."

Coby starts walking towards Brook, but Robin grabs his arm.

"Aren't we supposed to question them? You don't need to look at the body," She says.

"I need to see if anything on his body will hint at who did it!" Coby insists, "You're the detective!"

"It's faster with a partner," Robin lies easily.

"Inspecting the body will only take a moment and it will make questioning easier," Coby says. Robin lets him go, not wanting to raise suspicion. She watches him lean over Brook, stepping back. Nami better be done, or this was about to be busted if Brook couldn't keep acting dead.

Coby's thankful he wore gloves with his suit, it'll allow him to inspect the murder weapon without leaving finger prints. He pulls back the sheet, then reaches down to pull the knife from the musician's chest when a hand stops him. It's the musician. Coby doesn't have time to scream before the back-from-the-dead man starts laughing at him.

"Brook..." Sanji sighs, frowning. There goes the plan.

"I'm sorry!" Brook laughs, clutching his stomach, "it--it was just so WORTH it!"

"What's going on!?" Coby cries, wrenching his hand away from Brook. He steps back as Brook sits up. Off to the side, Luffy beams. Brook's alright, but why was he playing dead?

"Shit," Zoro groans, leaning his forehead on Luffy's head as he processed the pure stupidity of his crew, "Brook, you idiot! You better hope Nami is done!"

Brook stands, dusting himself off.

"No one answered me, what just happened!?" Coby says.

"I think we're done here," Robin says, ignoring Coby entirely.

"Brook's alive!" Luffy says, trying to look up at Zoro, which is hard considering Zoro still has his head on top of Luffy's.

"He's ruined the plan, that's what he did," Sanji sighs, pushing the mask up his face.

"The 'plan'? You planned this? Was everyone in on this?" Coby says.

"Unfortunately," Sanji says, and Usopp tosses his mask off, "We all are. It's the distraction."

"Wait a minute..." Coby looks to Zoro, "Z-Zoro? Roronoa Zoro?"

"Yes, Roronoa Zoro," Zoro says, "Hope Franky's ready, because we have to go."

"It's that group of thieves!" Roswald yells, pointing, "Somebody get them! Don't let them escape this party!”

"Hey!" Nami yells from an upper balcony in the ballroom, waving her hands, "We're outside! Get going!"

"That's our cue," Zoro says, and without further prompting, the group makes a break for the door. Most of the guests, the nobles and the rich, are too busy checking to see if they still have their valuables in the presence of thieves to stop their escape. The mass of wealthy people in the room stops security from being able to reach the group, and no one wants to be plowed over by Luffy or his friends.

Franky has the car open, valuables piled in the various spaces on the floor. Luffy dives in first with Zoro after him, pulling him in close for protecting. Luffy thinks it's for protection, anyway.

The rest of the group squeezes in as well, though it's more cramped with the ninth member. Nami sits in the driver seat and Robin takes the passenger seat to avoid being squished.

Zoro sits in a seat and holds Luffy in his lap. He tells himself he's making room for Brook, and in the scramble no one seems to notice. Luffy wraps his arms around Zoro, pulling his knees in to accommodate for Brook's longer limbs.

"Brook, why'd you die?" Luffy asks as he snags Zoro's forgotten mask and starts messing with it.

"They were making a scene so I could rob the place without interruption," Nami says as she starts driving.

"I didn't actually die," Brook says, "I faked it."

"Clearly," Zoro says, "or else we'd be talking to a... I don't know, a fucking skeleton."

Brook laughs.

"Wouldn't that be frightening?" He says. Luffy shakes his head.

"I think it'd be cool!" Luffy says, "I want to be friends with a skeleton!"

"And we didn't tell you this plan because you'd be awful at keeping to it." Usopp says, patting Luffy's head.

"I'll tell you what was frightening, Luffy ready to kill one of us when Brook collapsed." Sanji scoffs.

"I thought it was flattering," Brook says.

"I wasn't scared! I'm sure I could take him if we fought!" Usopp says, "But I wouldn't want to."

"Hurting each other isn't what friends do," Luffy says, "I don't want you guys to die or anything."

"You don't have to worry. None of us are dying anytime soon," Sanji says.

"Brook IS pretty old, though..." Zoro comments.

"I still have plenty of life left in me," Brook says, "It'll take a lot to kill this old man."

"Nami, did we get lots of money?" Luffy asks, putting on Zoro's demon mask.

"Yeah, lots of wallets and jewelry. I'm not sure how much it's all worth, but it's easily thousands," Nami says.

"That's good." Luffy leans back. He didn't really care too much about money, but it was nice to have. He absently pats at Zoro’s wrist, bored.

The car ride passes with idle talk, since they were out fast enough that they weren't chased. They reach their hideout in a few more minutes, an abandoned boat tied to an used dock which they'd taken over. Everyone disperses when they arrive, heading off to get changed out of their fancy getups. It's late, so most of them head to bed shortly after. Despite the calm and quiet in the bedroom neither Luffy nor Zoro can sleep, too much on both their minds. Zoro gets Luffy's attention by waving his hand.

"You wanna go to the front?" Zoro whispers to Luffy, referring to the tip of the boat, where Luffy likes to sit. Luffy nods. He heads up to the front of the ship, letting Zoro follow. When he gets there he stops, waiting for Zoro rather than sitting in his spot on the mast.

In the ballroom, during the dance, Luffy almost kissed Zoro. He'd been so caught up in the moment, he hadn't even got a chance to ask if Zoro was alright with that before everything happened. Zoro stops in front of Luffy, lapsing into an awkward silence. They both search for something to say, but Zoro finds something first.

"You... haven't taken the ring off."

"No, I guess I forgot," Luffy says. He looks down at his hand. In the dark, the ring almost looks real, "I like it."

"You never struck me as a jewelry type," Zoro says, stepping a bit closer so he could grab Luffy's hand.

"This is different," Luffy says. He keeps his eyes on his hand in Zoro's.

"The ring, or...?" Zoro looks at Luffy instead of his hand, "or what I'm doing?"

"The ring, but what Zoro is doing is different, too," Luffy says, "I had fun tonight, pretending to be Zoro's husband."

"Did you?" Zoro grins a bit, "you know, you were trying to show me something, but we got interrupted."

"I was going for a kiss," Luffy admits.

"So, you still want to?" Zoro asks, "Kiss, I mean. We don't have to."

"I want to," Luffy says. He reaches up to hold Zoro's face in his hands, "I really, really want to."

"Then we can." Zoro says quietly, putting a hand on Luffy's lower back and splaying it. He leans down and kisses the corner of Luffy's mouth. Zoro pulls back after, but Luffy hugs his neck to stop him from going far.

"Back when that lady was talking to us, Zoro said something that sounded really sincere. He said he'd loved me since the day we met," Luffy says, "Did he mean that?"

"...I meant it," Zoro says, "I have. Ever since I saw you."

"I feel the same. I've always felt the same," Luffy says, "Maybe we really are soulmates."

"Maybe." Zoro says, lifting Luffy up. "Maybe we are."

Luffy grins, wrapping his legs around Zoro's waist to hold himself up.

"I would like that," Luffy says. He holds out his hand, looking at his ring over Zoro's shoulder, "I think I'm going to keep wearing this."

"What, a fake plastic ring?" Zoro snorts, "you just kind of jumped right into marriage again."

"I'm not thinking of it like marriage! It's like a souvenir," Luffy says, "Instead of marriage, it's from the night Zoro first said he loved me."

"An anniversary ring," Zoro says, comfortable holding Luffy, "Maybe I'll keep mine, too."

Luffy leans his head on Zoro's shoulder.

"We'd be matching," Luffy says.

"Do you want to match?" Zoro asks, turning his head and kissing Luffy's nose. Luffy laughs.

"I wouldn't mind matching," Luffy says.

"Then I'll keep it," Zoro says, "I need to thank Nami."

“What for?” Luffy asks.

"She told me she made us the couple so this shit could happen," Zoro sighs.

"Guess I should thank her, too," Luffy says.

"Why didn't we act on this sooner?" Zoro asks, humming.

"Well, I know Zoro's pretty dumb," Luffy says.

"I know you're dumber," Zoro says

"Rude," Luffy says, "Zoro's rude and dumb and I'm in love with him."

"Luffy's rude and dumb and I'm in love with him more," Zoro responds, grinning. Luffy pulls his head off Zoro's shoulder so he can look at Zoro's face.

"If Zoro loves me so much, then why not he kiss me again?" Luffy asks. Zoro leans in and kisses Luffy again, repeating his actions over and over to get the point across. Luffy eventually breaks away, and he leans back in Zoro's arms to look up at the sky. The air's clear, and he can see thousands of stars.

"They're bright," Luffy says. He looks down at Zoro, then grins. To Zoro, that's brighter than anything in the sky, day or night. There's no need for sunshine, not with Luffy so close. Zoro has the sea below him, the stars around him, and Luffy in his arms. He doesn't ever need anything else.

**Author's Note:**

> okay! once again, this was written with tumblr user baratiepromise, not only myself! this was also writter for zolu week! we tried to fit every prompt of the week in, the prompts being fantasy au, modern au, soulmate au, free space, sunshine, pain, and dance! today's free space, so we figured it'd be best to post it today. if you want to see more content for the week, go to the tumblr blog zolu-week ! you'll find art and fics by plenty of skilled creators, including art by maddie and a second fic by myself (tumblr user asexualzoro) later this week which won't be going up anywhere but tumblr! thank you to everyone reading, we hope you enjoyed!


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